How to Relax, Regardless
October 29, 2009 by admin
Filed under Relaxation Ideas
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So what exactly do we mean by relax? Is it mental or is it physical? Does it depend on how others behave towards us? Does it depend on our behaviour towards others? Or is it our behaviour towards our self? Is it a state of being or is it a state of doing? Too many questions are not too relaxing – or does it relax us to think and find answers to our questions?
So what exactly do we mean by relaxing? The everyday use of the word ‘relax’ is very confusing. From the body mind and soul perspective relaxing is holistic. Physiologically – relaxation means the absence of a stress response, to rest, to make things loose or lax. Psychologically ‘relax’ may mean to let go, to becalm, to not worry. Spiritually ‘relax’ may mean to meditate, to be mindful, to simply be present, and be non-judgmental. Holistically it will mean all of the above. Relax therefore is a behaviour response, an attitude response and a being response.
How to relax as a behaviour response: Following a daily regimen of systematic progressive muscle relaxation procedure will ingrain a habit of physically relaxing under the most trying circumstances.
This will take a total of 15 minutes. Find a place where you are not likely to be disturbed during that time. This is a self-awareness exercise where you focus on each muscle of your body and get them to relax. Sit comfortably where you are likely to be still for the duration. Make a close assessment of how you feel now? Are you agitated, stiff, frustrated, anxious, depressed. Where are the aches, stiffness and tensions? Just notice and be aware of them. Make a mental note or diarize if you like so that you can compare this state with your state after the exercise.
Breathe normally. You may keep your eyes open or closed as long as you do not feel too relaxed and fall into a sleepy state. I normally start with my toes, but you can start with your head if you wish. As long as you start with one end of your body and end at the other end, it will work for you. Also you must do each step on both sides of your body.
Start with your toes and feel the stiffness. Move them around, tighten them and then let go slowly and relax. Move up the feet, the heels, the legs, the thighs, the buttocks, the groin. By this time your entire lower body must be completely relaxed. Move – tighten -loosen (5 times), let go gradually and repeat the word relax.
Now focus on your stomach. Pull your stomach in as far in as possible while you breathe out and then breathe in to bring back to normal position.
Move up to the chest region. Breathe in to take in maximum air. Hold your breath and try to bring the shoulder blades together by arching your back. Bring shoulders back to normal while exhaling.
For your neck, bend your head forward to try to touch your chin with your chest and then back. Rotate your head clockwise and then anti-clockwise.
For the back, arch your back backwards and then bring back to normal.
To the shoulders then, raise them and then back to position. Rotate them clockwise and then anticlockwise.
For the hands stretch them forward. Fist and unfist your palms and fingers. Rotate your wrist and then bend your hands at the elbow.
Move your attention to your face. Exercise the jaws, the cheeks and the eyes by stretching and relaxing. Raising the eyebrows exercises your forehead, squeezing the eyes shut exercises the eyes, pulling your cheeks towards your ears exercises the cheeks.
How to relax as an attitude response: An attitude is a psychological response – it is what is in the mind. It is important to remember that even the worst of events are by themselves not stressful. It is our fear, anticipation or perception of events that make our responses to them stressful. An attitudinal response will therefore mean;
1. To be self aware
2. To live in the present
3. To realize the difference between ‘being in control’ and ‘controlling’
4. To take responsibility for one’s choices
5. To not worry about eventualities. Being prepared to face events and worrying about them are not the same.
6. To be optimistic
7. Have an attitude of gratitude – there is always something good about what we call bad – the law of opposites. What would you have, the good or the bad?
It has been remarked that I am too logical, people have emotions too. Yes, of course, I am no Dr. Spock, I have emotions too. The question is whether I am in control of my emotions or emotions control me? Often it is not a question of emotions; it is a question of taking responsibility for our emotions. Those who are afraid to take responsibility for their emotions blame others or circumstances, those who take responsibility for their emotions, find ways to stay happy regardless.
How to relax as a spiritual response: The world ’spiritual’ is often connoted to be religious. However, there are clear distinctions between the two. Here, by spiritual I mean to explain phenomena beyond mere outer appearances and the five senses. To be spiritual means to have an intuitive perception rather than rational deductive reasoning of the causes behind external and internal conditions. To be spiritual is to first change and uplift oneself by transforming and improving one’s own perspectives, by transcending from me (physical) to I (soul). To have a spiritual response will mean;
1. Know your self – who you are?
2. Know your purpose – why you are here?
3. Practice mindfulness
4. Do your duty ordained by your nature to achieve your purpose
5. Practice universal principles of peaceful co-existence
6. Practice visualization – use your imagination.
7. Write your affirmations and repeat them sincerely, audibly as many times as possible.
“The greatest discovery of any generation is that human beings, by changing their attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.” – William James
Putting it all together:
Relaxing whether during a particular time of the day, the entire day or the entire life is a matter of choice and habit that can be inculcated by anyone.
Yoga has the answer to these and a simple regimen of an hour a day can help anyone reap the benefits of relaxing.
Start with a 20 minute schedule of exercise.
Get into the physical awareness exercise as entailed above
Do a ten minute breathing (pranayama) exercise
Do a ten minute meditation
Tone your muscles
Have an attitude of relaxation
Follow a regimen of mindfulness
Live in the present
If you wish to know how to relax with an hour of Yoga everyday, please let me know.
Sanjay Behuria
“Achieve Your Unlimited Potential”
Coach – Life, Executive, Business, Relationship
Facilitator – Workshops, Seminars and Meetings
Consultant – Small Business and Non-Profit
Trainer – Yoga
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